When bad things happen, it is easy for us to feel as if God has abandoned us or is punishing us, even though it is clear good things happen to bad people and bad things happen to good people. We sometimes start to feel guilty or as if we need to change course when bad things happen since we think if we are “doing things right,” we should be rewarded! Yet the sun rises on the evil and the good and rain falls on the righteous and unrighteous. Basically, it’s a crapshoot. The fact that bad things are happening to you does not necessarily mean you have done something wrong or you are headed in the wrong direction. It could, but sometimes it means you’re headed in the right direction. I often tell people (usually when they are setting a boundary or trying on some new behavior), “If it’s difficult, you know you’re doing it right!” People don’t usually like that. 🙂

The thing to do when bad things happen is not to immediately start feeling guilty or anxious because God has abandoned you or is mad at you. It’s to figure out how you can grow and what you can learn from the stress. God is forming you. That’s different than saying God is punishing you. This is just a new and different thing you are encountering, and you have an opportunity to become better for it. Imagine what it would be like if you didn’t encounter hard things. Think of how plants would grow if they were not pruned, or forests without forest fires, or totally undisciplined children. Those are unpleasant things. As we grow, we need a little difficulty to keep us moving in the right direction. Bad things happen not because God is against us. In fact, it could be they happen because he is for us. Those are the things that produce the most growth. It’s just hard to remember that when it’s happening.